but i'd like the pie heated and i don't want the ice cream on top i want it on the side and strawberry instead of vanilla...

everything i know about relationships i learned watching "when harry met sally." i know. it's awful. it's the medium through which my parents have always taught us girls. like, yesterday, my mother drives all the way to greenville just to go to target with me. she usually does this sort of thing when she thinks i'm on the brink of a total f-ing go-to-pieces. so, we're driving. i'm listing the various facts which make up my personal and professional life:
1. strep throat
2. moving from old home to new home with strep and no truck to haul bed.
3. working 12 hour days all weekend for culinary festival. most of this time is volunteer work. as in, someone volunteered me to bartend in the beating sun from 8am to 2pm yesterday. with strep throat.
4. my chef and her kitchen vs. other chef and other kitchen...which leads to verbal blow-out involving myself at culinary festival VIP party while passing hor d'ourve trays of mushroom empanadas.
5. girl likes boy. boy loves himself and in turn cannot love other people. or, boy likes girl but is otherwise spoken for. or, girl likes girl likes girl.
6. my sister is turning 30 and i'm supposed to supply various cheese and fruit trays for party wednesday.
7. every bill i've ever had to pay or have ever heard of is due.
8. hannah lives five hours away.*
9. favorite college student turns in reader response that says, "his imagery is amazing, i can literally imagine it!" comma splice+exclamation point+the obvious=heartbroken

my mother listens patiently,then says, as if this means everything, "you really need to watch 'educating rita.' with michael caine."
but this is the solution for everything with these people. once, i confided in my mother about something "really important" and she suggested i watch "bend it like beckham."

i can allude to WHMS during any conversation and have been able to since the 7th grade. in fact, adam and i had an entire conversation about why men and women can('t) be friends and only halfway through did we realize we'd ripped the whole thing straight out of the movie.

*okay, so it's happening. the shift that occurs in every relationship. you know, one person always loves the other person slightly more. it's somehow the only way we stick together as humans. push and pull. it's just the way things are. but what makes this truly interesting is that sometimes the roles flip, especially if you stick around long enough.
what i'm trying to say is, hannah officially wears the pants in this friendshipmarriage. i don't know exactly when and how it happened. she was making me dinner and fixing everything and calling all the time and i was demanding and emotionally vacant one minute and now, and now...SHE's the one who is unavailable (and don't blame this on the children; we're always blaming it on the children.), she's the bossy one (BLOG! mamie, BLOG! i'm not going alone on this!), i'm calling her frantically and often.
it hurts. but it also teaches us how to appreciate one another.

hannah, i don't know how to quit you and i don't want to. and i don't wanna miss a thing. i could stay awake just to hear you breathing, watch you smile while you are sleeping, far away and DREAMING. i could spend my life in this sweet surrender. i could stay lost in this moment forever. well every moment spent with you is a moment i treasure.
i don't wanna close my eyes. i don't wanna fall asleep, 'cause i'd miss you, babe, and i don't wanna miss a thing. hannah.