The Battlefield Where the Girls Say I Love You



That's just the thing: we will never tell you we love you. In fact, we're here only to hold hands across state lines and yell at the world. We're here to try to touch you across this chasm of flown things. Not even that. At most, I will teach you how to make a gin smoothie when there's nothing left in the house. Hannah can teach you several languages and what to do when your car breaks up with you. Thanks for coming out.

Monday, January 14, 2008

a small person after my own heart:

I. i check in with my mother on sunday. she says, "big news at your sister's house." which clearly means pregnant, dying, marriage, divorce. so i call their house. little morgan answers (somehow having conquered literacy and caller ID).

"hello, aunt mamie."

me: morg, heard y'all have got big news.

morgan: yeah. i lost my first tooth.

me: sweet. did you leave it under the pillow for the tooth fairy?

her: no. see, i wanted the tooth and the money both. so i wrote a letter to the tooth fairy and explained that to him. it worked out fine, like, i got the dollar and still have the tooth on a little blue pillow on my night table.

she made it seem more practical, less cake-and-eat-it. she made it seem, well, obvious that only crazies would give up their teeth for money.

II. i thought i'd kept a good eye on huckabee. as in, no dumb-ass-mr.-rogers-quote could get by me. at the gym sunday, i watched his entire speech to a prayer breakfast. something about not being anti-abortion, but being pro-life. as if the two have zero relationship with one another.

but my student, tori, says today: huckabee was asked about his plans for immigration. you know what he said? "two words: chuck norris."

III. my boss e-mailed me this article:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/10/fashion/10fitness.html?em&ex=1200200400&en=e014f8a95c53b552&ei=5087

people out there, like, editing self magazine, seem to think the whole compilation mix tape/cd thing is new. i dare say cutting edge. what i will say is: in no other life-genre (working out) can you get away with listening to shitty music.

ahem:

1. george michael...faith
2. usher...yeah
3. belle & sebastian...expectations
4. billy joel...we didn't start the fire
5. sinead oconner...nothing compares to you
6. u2...still haven't found what i'm looking for
7. springsteen...thunder road
8. dixie chicks...there's your trouble
9. nina simone...sinnerman
10. spoon...the way we get by
11. modest mouse...gravity rides everything
12. billy idol...dancing with myself
13. jay-z, mary j. blige...can't knock the hustle
14. cyndi lauper...girls just want to have fun
15. paul simon...graceland
16. tupac...how do you want it


* i also recommend cooling down with "girl from impanema" and "anyone else but you," the moldy peaches. oh, and "love the world you find," by flaming lips.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I thought it was only in San Francisco that the tooth fairy was an ACTUAL homosexual. I like the way your sister's raising Morgan. In fact, I'm all about it.

Cue said...

"How Do You Want It" is TOTALLY a work-out mix must. Good call.

T. said...

TRACK 7!

hannah said...

wait, why are some of these on the bad mix? snob! what's next? dissing you can go your own way or faithfully??

Mamie said...

hannah, don't ask stupid questions. also, not "bad." lenient.

eric said...

Did Dasiy (DS Barringer?) marry an oil tycoon from Texas w/o telling anyone?

Wow, I heard Tom's heart hit the floor from across the city.

I have this horrible image of May May dressed in a pink leotard with white leg warmers, wearing some sort of green headband, smoking a Virginia Slim and doing aerobics to We Didn't Start the Fire. Thanks, May May.

xoxox

Mamie said...

would we call it "horrible;" would we? really?

eric said...

Oops. I meant HOT. Smokin' hot. :) Like Olivia Newton John hot from the Let's Get Physical video. Hot like that, I mean. You know, right? Right!?!?! HOT!
Can't wait 'til your next visit! I'll be sure to wear a protective cup. :)

JaySlacks said...

We didn't start the fire? Geez.